May 12, 2015

32 weekend thoughts {as random as they come}

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I really should write down the things that cross my mind. My stream of conscious could seriously be it's own comedy show.

This weekend was no exception. Here are just a few of the things that crossed my mind.

+ I'm too old for this
+ Ranch is perfectly acceptable as pizza sauce right?
+ I'm like a soccer mom without the kids
+ It's been too long since I cleaned the shower
+ It's been WAY TOO long since I cleaned the shower.
+ I need a cleaning lady
+ My stitches hurt
+ F*CK!!!! I just got stung by a bee.
+ Yep, that's gonna swell
+ I should have bought flowers for myself, I'm a dog/cat mom


+ If I smash up this burrito I can use it as chip dip
+ Why are my spikes dying?
+ I'm a plant murderer
+ I just paid to have my dog man-scaped
+ At least there won't be more poop dingleberrys for a while
+ I just want to eat popcorn in peace
+ My dog is better looking than I am
+ Can I just skip work until vacation?
+ Is that cat crap on the floor?
+ I'm going to regret this in the morning
+ I WANT TO PLAY MEGARUIT
+ I'm waaaaayy to old for this (attempting a keg stand)


+ Please bring me champagne so I can not feel like I'm not dying
+ So that's what it's called ( After the waiter called it a Poinsettia when you do a mimosa with cranberry juice instead of orange juice)
+ Snatches overcooked the egg in my benedict
+ I'll have to have another
+ YES MORE CHAMPAGNE
+ Seriously why are they always out of benedicts?
+ I deserve a nap
+ Dog Mom Day, treat yo' self


+ Little Mermaid is definitely happening
+ I'll never be too old for Disney movies
 
Is it Friday yet?
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11 comments:

  1. Ha! Love this. I'm sorry you got stung by a bee!!! Now I want to smoosh up a burrito for dip!

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  2. Really fun post! I am a proud dog momma too, it's the best! :)
    I just did a post on "Healthy Treats for your Pooch" if you'd like to check it out!

    Have a great week! :)

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  3. I laughed out loud at this! God knows I say the same things most weekends! Happy Tuesday, friend!!

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  4. Hahah you are hilarious. My husband would love you for saying ranch is considered pizza sauce ;) seriously he puts that stuff on everything!!!!

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  5. Our nearest Papa John's has Ranch as a sauce choice. It's good with chicken, bacon, and onions.

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  6. I feel like I think "I'm too old for this" about as often if not more often than you did this weekend! also now I want to watch the little mermaid....

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  7. You never cease to make me laugh, girl!

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  8. You never cease to make me laugh, girl!

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  9. LOL. Never too old for keg stands..or at least that's what I'm telling myself

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  10. I'm a little disappointed Krickit forgot all about Mothers Day... LOL

    Poinsetta's?! I NEED to try one! In 7 day I'm def. going to! There's no way in hell I could even attempt a keg stand anymore - I'd probly die from the exertion of getting up there, let alone the alcohol. When did I get old?! haha

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  11. LOL! You crack me up! ;) Man-scaping your dog made me almost spit my water out!!! And I'm glad everything ended with how Disney movies rule the world!!!

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